This is the final part of ‘The Perks of Being a WAHlflower’. I hope you enjoyed it! If you’re late to the party, you can read them in order starting from the beginning by clicking here: https://balladsandwords.wordpress.com/category/the-perks-of-being-a-wahlflower/?order=asc And now, the conclusion…
So it was that Waluigi sat in his house, having been discharged from the hospital because the doctors had forgotten about him, with several quite nasty injuries that hadn’t been bad enough to kill him and let him respawn.
Slowqueen floated through the stone corridors, head in her hands.
She couldn’t think. She couldn’t think. She couldn’t think!
She could see them through the cameras. She could hear them through the windows. Those she could ignore.
But the thoughts of a mob are deafening. United by a single purpose, yet simultaneously chaotic. A disharmonious racket of anger.
It was some time later. Slowqueen was alone in the flight deck.
She’d managed to tap into the Bowser’s Castle PA system. She’d ordered the assorted tortoises and other minions, and their noisy irritating minds, to go out and claim Peach’s Castle. That left only her, the imprisoned Peach, and the sentient stone traps in the building.
This was more or less the way she liked it. It allowed her to get on with planning her final gambit.
Waluigi was busy dancing around the room. He was, as a result, too busy to see Slowqueen using her psychic powers to throw Bowser into his own lava moat. He’d be fine, he’d survived being burned to death many times; but in the meanwhile, it was time for dancing.
Oh to be home! To be one of only about five members of your species! To be among weird bipedal mushroom people who forgot you existed after you passed them! To witness repeated political crises, and watch as the duo you based your entire existence on solved them through violence!
For a moment, Waluigi remembered why he’d left.
It was a small island, covered in orchids and little shrubs. Seemingly taken over by nature, vines and long grass provided copious trip hazards. The shrubs ought to have been small enough for Waluigi to step over. He tried, pricked himself in the groin, and didn’t try again.
The Surf had gone smoothly enough. The toes of his shoes dipped into the water: otherwise he remained dry. The mosquitos were paying close attention, but Waluigi had never been very biteable, and Slowpoke seemed immune. Having Surfed on her, this was probably because of her rubbery skin. Not the tastiest meal, he imagined.
If she’d heard him thinking that, she didn’t show it. She seemed… preoccupied.
It was after the battle was over.
‘Oh! I have been defeated! Alack, alay! Lady Korrina gave a terrible display! This is it. I must give up my title and admit that your strength far exceeds…’
Korrina could parrot off her spiel in her sleep – she had done, once, which had been rather embarrassing the morning after. Doing so now gave her time to process what had just happened.