The Perks of Being a WAHlflower – Part 10

This is the final part of ‘The Perks of Being a WAHlflower’.  I hope you enjoyed it!  If you’re late to the party, you can read them in order starting from the beginning by clicking here:  And now, the conclusion…

So it was that Waluigi sat in his house, having been discharged from the hospital because the doctors had forgotten about him, with several quite nasty injuries that hadn’t been bad enough to kill him and let him respawn.

Continue reading

The Perks of Being a WAHlflower – Part 8

It was some time later. Slowqueen was alone in the flight deck.

She’d managed to tap into the Bowser’s Castle PA system. She’d ordered the assorted tortoises and other minions, and their noisy irritating minds, to go out and claim Peach’s Castle. That left only her, the imprisoned Peach, and the sentient stone traps in the building.

This was more or less the way she liked it. It allowed her to get on with planning her final gambit.

Continue reading

The Perks of Being a WAHlflower – Part 5

It was a small island, covered in orchids and little shrubs. Seemingly taken over by nature, vines and long grass provided copious trip hazards. The shrubs ought to have been small enough for Waluigi to step over. He tried, pricked himself in the groin, and didn’t try again.

The Surf had gone smoothly enough. The toes of his shoes dipped into the water: otherwise he remained dry. The mosquitos were paying close attention, but Waluigi had never been very biteable, and Slowpoke seemed immune. Having Surfed on her, this was probably because of her rubbery skin. Not the tastiest meal, he imagined.

If she’d heard him thinking that, she didn’t show it. She seemed… preoccupied.

Continue reading

The Perks of Being a WAHlflower – Part 4

It was after the battle was over.

‘Oh! I have been defeated! Alack, alay! Lady Korrina gave a terrible display! This is it. I must give up my title and admit that your strength far exceeds…’

Korrina could parrot off her spiel in her sleep – she had done, once, which had been rather embarrassing the morning after. Doing so now gave her time to process what had just happened.

Continue reading

The Perks of Being a WAHlflower – Part 3

The leader of the local gym was a woman named Korrina.

Korrina’s job was to battle people, normally children, who managed to complete the (simplistic) gym puzzles and reach her. Her squad of intentionally underpowered Pokémon would provide a moderate challenge. If she was defeated, which happened about seventy per cent of the time, she would award them the gym’s badge. In very rare cases, she then awarded them something else.

This was the extent of her job. It was very boring. The gym was only interesting to roller-skate around so many times, so she whiled aware the hours playing a popular mascot kart-racing game with her Lucario.

Continue reading